Mach Investigates: RPF Dying?

Satire is MY category, you’ve been warned.

Watch this video, I guarantee you will be hysterical. Then read the post.


The Rebel Penguin Federation was an army that wasn’t even worthy of attention when they had miniscule sizes of 5. They would have gleams of hope when Commando made his annual visits to the RPF, but it would die out quickly. Then finally, RPF reached world power sizes of 50-60+, and seemed unstoppable, even in the midst of their war with the Nachos.

RPF gets into iceberg circling position.

RPF waddles around the water at the cove.

RPF shows their luck with some 4 leaf clovers.

But those times didn’t last forever. They entered (and then withheld) from the UMA-ACP war. They focused on the Legends Cup (which they won), but with no wars and just peace, trouble in paradise came to boot. The RPF started a series of daily battles called the “Snowball Wars”, in efforts to re-create that “2007” feeling and recapture the snowball spirit. RPF states these wars are massive, but with recent pictures compared to their past sizes, it seems as though everything isn’t as big as it once was, with them getting sizes of 25 at the Snowball War events.

RPF setting up a blockade as they battle ACP.

RPF chanting their 3 famed words, “When darkness falls”

RPF showing their soccer skills, and passing gas after having eaten some wicked beans.

Yes, these are very solid sizes, but in comparison to the strength they have displayed in the past, I think they can do a little better. I have a video of the Mammoth Snowball war, and what I want you to do is compare it with the video I will put right after it (Their legends cup battle), and I want you to respond (in poll form of course) to how you think RPF has/hasn’t changed. Just be honest, you don’t have to watch the whole videos, but a minute or so will be enough to catch the gist of things.

^ Snowball wars ^

v Legends Cup v

Invest your full honesty into this poll:

This has been a post in the Mach Investigates series

24 Responses

  1. RPF isnt gonna die, it is growing. Besides, many of us got school or cant access their computer on the weekends (not me). We aint 25 years old or whatever.


    • Only a few years off..


    • You think people in AR don’t have school? Don’t blame it on school buddy.


      • Well then I guess RPF has bigger ages and that we have more school responsibilities then AR. RPF has reallly big ages. I am 14 and in my school the very first week I got 3 exams 4 essays due the same day and 1 quiz in monday. So I think AR is still in elementary school and have less work than we do cause highschool is big stuff you know, so we are not dying. From the alot of homework, exams we even don’t have the time even on afternoons. So why don’t you declare war on people your same school level? Where did you get the idea that Elmikey was corrupt anyways? You guys lost your minds. I think the leaders don’t go to school and probably lost their brains or they have had hates or grudges with Elm. As I am saying we are not dying. Maybe AR is not as busy in school as us RPF 🙂




    • Nothing lasts forever, but some things are worth holding onto and fighting for. Say as you wish, but there will always be some penguins that will keep RPF alive and fight the good fight.


      • I don’t think RPF will stay alive, you can say you will “fight the good fight” all you want, but RPF is slowly dying, due to Elmikey, reecruitings leaving, etc. The reason RPF recruits are leaving is because of Elmikey scheduling 668769798789 events a day. What Elmikey doesn’t realize is that some of us have lives, and yet he continues to schedule so many events a day, and a week. I have not seen someone this corrupted for as long as I have been in CP armies. RPF troops just continue to leave as Elmikey continues to schedule so many events a day, or in a week. By the way, it’s kind of stupid for Elmikey trying to bring back the old CP warfare, because it will not work. The old CP warfare has passed on, and what he should know by now is that we’re in a new version of CP warfare.


  3. Their Era is coming to a close, Their Sources of Recruits are running low because they over-harvested. Have they not learned anything about over-harvesting of fish?


  4. Elm being a ruthless dictatorship and his fetish for old school CP is slowly killing the RPF. You even debate his decision and you’re gone. A lot of RPF soldiers have quit, and there is a rebellion starting as well.

    IMO, the RPF is already dead. Because what we’re seeing today isn’t the RPF. It’s a disgrace to the RPF’s legacy.


  5. Lol so many voted for rpfs death xD


  6. I don’t get what was so funny about the vid, but anyway nice post


  7. the RPF is not dieing,we had more people at the legends cup becouse its realy importent,we just dident get as mutch at snowball wars becouse its not very importent


  8. RPF wasn’t “dying” when we maxed 5 for 12 months straight, so they’re nowhere near death at this point in time.


  9. To be honest, just because you predict RPF is going to ”die out” or insist Elm is an ”evil dictator n00b” or whatever the hell you wanna call him, it’s not going to change anything. RPF is going to keep doing their thing, they don’t let bad pres or their enemie’s media provoke them (well, they try). I personally think we should all focus our energy into something positive, like improving our own army’s tactics and chats. Or just continue wasting your energy trying to make RPF plummet and getting sucked into your own hate for RPF,(that you probably only have because you believe what other people, mainly enemies of RPF, have told you, rather then listening to RPF’s side as well) it’s your choice.Rpf will just keep going. Tearing someone down wont bring you up, remember that ;).


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