SATIRE: Mock The Penguin – Pains Retirement

Hello all and welcome to the new CPAC series. I have been hired to work on a new column, which is basically making fun of people in a NICE way. I call this series ”Mock The Penguin”, which is where I pick a topic about an indivisaul and mock them in a NICE way. Anyways enough with that, time to get on with our first topic: Lord Pains temporary retirement.

Now, I guess we all agree that Pain was not a like able character. He got couped in every army he led, and even got the nickname ”Hitler” for his strong belief of the Army of Club Penguin and the White Alliance. He was pretty much hated by 90% of the army community. I actually liked him at one point, but I learnt he can be very cocky and arrogant. Even the Black Alliance didn’t like him, although he hated the ACP more than anyone and wanted them gone for good. 

This made it difficult for armies to let him join for a high rank. He was a Nachos mod, then a Dark Warriors mod, then attempted to recreate the Tostitos, which then died. He then tried looking for more armies to join in, and finally landed in the Shadow Troops. Commando993, creator of the Shadow Troops, believed that Pain could bring the Shadow Troops to first. Although he didn’t do so, he still got the Shadow Troops to good sizes of 20.

Anyway, people got mad about Pain firing legends so they decided to make rebellions. All of them failed, except for Vetsds one. He defaced the Shadow Troops site and got it deleted, then recreated the Shadow Troops. However, this was AFTER Pain made a retirement post. The retirement post was very funny, specially at the end when he told his ”fans” to keep in supporting him and to hate on the ACP, didn’t know Pain was a loved celebrity in CP Armies, maybe in Germany, but not CP Armies (Like this post if you understood that joke). Pain wrote a big a$$ post that I can’t be bothered to explain, but all I could remember was playing this song while looking for the interesting bits.

*In the song, replace the word ”Jews” with ACP troops, and replace Melben Gibsonstein with Waterkid, and imagine Pauly D as Boomer 20, and it’ll make sense*

I couldn’t have listened to that song while reading anybody else’s retirement post, it just felt right.

Well, Pain is coming back on the 03/10/13, and by then he will show us all the way. But for now, I shall show you all the way to paradise in CP Armies, and destroy the ACP!

Okay I keed, but that’s the end of this post. In the comments, tell me who else I should mock.

28 Responses

  1. This post made miss ILOL. Mach was one funny kid

    Like

  2. Is this a rip off of “Mock The Week” or something from BBC?

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  3. Damn this was a funny post. Mostly cause Pain is insane in a really funny way.

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  4. i live in idaho *wary*

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  5. Mock stars

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  6. You know I don’t like Pain, and I think the idea is good. But I fear this “Mock The Penguin” thing will eventually be carried to far.

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  7. dont you dare mock me, water

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  8. Mock me, I want to know how everyone thinks of me!

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  9. Mock the huge noobs in cp warfare. Preferably camplazlo, gamma gal, and christohper1.

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  10. Lol mock yourself Water… Cause you have a lot of “fans”

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  11. “indivisaul” someone got a case of the Down’s Syndrome.

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  12. My friend’s birthday is March 10th. How dare Pain fill what used to be a good day for me with notoriety and sadness.

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  13. I played the song like 5 times

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  14. mock pengy

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  15. Lol water and pain believe in the same things. To make fun of one is making fun of the other.

    Like

  16. I smell irony, thy name is waterkid.

    Like

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